Chapter One: Breaking the Glass
He was beautiful in mind and body
but could get under your skin in only a few seconds. He was stubborn and usually always
right. His views on the world were
skewed and he saw everything with red in his eyes. Michael’s fascination with his seemingly soft
dark copper brown hair, chocolate eyes, tan skin and confident stride, was short
lived when he first met Lukas. Michael
was visiting his editor when he heard his voice coming from the hallway. When he left his editor’s office he saw him
and couldn’t help but stare. Lukas was
arguing with another man and Michael tried to move around them but the look he
received from Lukas over the other man’s shoulder was almost enough to freeze
him. Michael looked down at his feet as
he walked by.
“Michael!” he heard a familiar voice calling to
him. He turned around and saw a fellow
writer jogging to catch up with him from the same building he had just left.
“Hey, Yuuki.” He slowed his pace. “How’s the comic going?”
“We’ll see,” he chuckled, “I just
dropped off the latest story board, hopefully my editor will like the direction
I decided to go in. I know it’s going to
make him fall off his chair in shock, but after the shock wears off he’ll
understand why I did it.”
“Oh yeah, did you go with what we talked
about or did you tweek it again?” Michael asked.
“I only changed a few things, I
liked where we were. Thanks, by the way,
for all your help.” Yuuki said with a
smile on his face. Yuuki was half
Japanese half mutt, which gave him an interesting look. He had slanted eyes and dark hair, kept neat,
but he had a tan complexion and hazel eyes.
If he wasn’t 5’4” he could be a model.
And what a shame that would be, he was a genius with a pen, both with a
story and his drawings. Michael and he
had been friends since junior high school and shared ideas more often than not
and they were better for it.
“Well, if Johnathan doesn’t like it,
we’ll just find another editor,” Michael said jokingly.
“Ha!
Now now, he’s gotten me this far, I have faith he’ll make the right
decision.” Yuuki said. “Wanna stop for a bite?” he asked as they
approached a little hole-in-the-wall pub.
“I assume you just handed in your manuscript as well?” Michael nodded. “So it’s a waiting game for you too, why not
fill our bellies as well as our time?”
“Are you buying?” Michael asked with a grin.
“Are you kidding? I’m just a broke
artist.” He replied lifting up his hands to show the ink stains on his fingers.
“Fine,” Michael said with a fake
sigh, “I guess I’ll get this one.” He said reaching for the door of the
pub. “Mmm, fried food.” He said as the
air wafted out of the building.
“Now I’m really hungry,” Yuuki said.
They ate mostly in silence until
Michael dropped a gravy soaked fry into his lap and to the floor. “Oh, you little bastard,” he said, looking
after the runaway potato.
After he finished laughing at him,
Yuuki said, “Speaking of which, did you see Lukas today, that smug bastard? He acts like he is king of New York. No, the world.
He does know that he is only a play-write, right?”
“Yes, but he knows that he’s a damn
good one, even if he has a terrible attitude.”
Michael said, around a bite of burger.
“Every time I see him, I want to
punch right in his stupid face.” Yuuki
grimaced at the thought.
“That’s the first time I’ve ever
actually saw him in person.” Michael
said, lowering his head to hide the slight flush he felt at his initial thought
of Lukas.
“Really?” he asked. “I must have bad luck, I run into him every
time I’m I meet with Johnathan. Which makes
it worse, because he usually makes his editor come to him, so he’s not at the
office often,” he made a pained face.
“Let’s change the subject.” Michael
said, with a sympathetic laugh. “How are
things going with, um… Sarah?”
“Linda?”
“Yeah, her.”
“Yeah, her.”
“She left me.” Yuuki said.
“What? Why?” Michael said in surprise.
“She said I was too much of a
‘child’ for her.”
“What?! Does
she know that you are a world renowned artist and author?”
“She does, in fact that’s what attracted her to me
in the first place. But apparently my comic doesn’t appeal to her friends so
she left me.”
“Aw, I’m sorry bud,” Michael pushed the remainder of
his fries towards Yuuki as if they would make him feel better.
“Its alright,” he said, reaching for a fry, “we
weren’t together that long.” He took a
bite, “Anyways, have you put any thought into your next book?”
“I have been trying but starting a new series is a
lot harder than I thought it would be. I
feel like I’m uninspired.”
“That’s a first.
You’ve been spewing ideas since we were little. How have you gone dry now?”
“I don’t know,” Michael said, leaning onto the
table.
“Don’t pout, you probably just need to get out
more. Expose yourself to new things, get
out of your comfort zone.”
“Okay, I’ll do that, if you come with me,” he said
sarcastically.
“Alright, I’ll go, just tell me when.” Yuuki said seriously.
Michael just looked at him for a moment, “Fine. How about tonight, I know you don’t have
plans on a Thursday night.” He reached
for a fry and licked the gravy off his fingers after he ate it. “On one condition, we don’t try to pick up
any girls, you have a weird mix of ethnicities that always leaves me in their
blind spot.” Michael was tall, but he
was scrawny and pale. He had dirty blond
hair that he pulled up into a hasty bun and dark green eyes.
“If we dress you up, you’d get plenty of ladies.” He
motioned to Michael’s faded jeans, loose, old “Legend of Zelda” t-shirt and
unbuttoned dress shirt. “Is that what
you call, dressed-up?” he asked, holding his stomach and holding in a laugh.
“You know Tori doesn’t care, as long as my
manuscript is good, he is happy,” Michael snapped playfully.
“He may not, but his fashion sense is just as bad as
yours.”
“When did you become my gay friend?” Michael jabbed.
Yuuki raised his hands as if offended, “No need for
that,” he said. “Come to my house before
8 and I’ll let you pick something out of my closet.
“Again, I ask, when did you become my gay
friend?” Yuuki just stared at him. “Okay, okay, I’ll come over, geeze.”
They finished up their meal and went their separate
ways. Michael lived close enough to the
publishing company he was in contract with to walk home and he liked the brisk
air of winter. It hadn’t started snowing
yet but the Christmas lights were going up everywhere. He stopped outside his apartment building and
took in a last deep breath of cold air before heading up. He turned on his stereo and sat down with a
pencil and notebook at his desk.
“New ideas.” He thought out loud. He sat there for fifteen minutes, not
thinking of anything. “Damn it!” he
slammed the pencil down and got up. He
went to the spare room and pulled out a box half filled with Christmas lights
and a tiny tree. He set up the tree on
his small kitchen table and the lights around his front window. He plugged them in and stood in the almost
dark room. He enjoyed the feeling of the
lights and the warmth that they should give him. He had a hard childhood and had no memories
of a good, or any Christmas. He sighed
and laid down on the hardwood floor. It
was cold but he closed his eyes and just listened to the music.
He laid there for a long time, until his alarm
started causing a ruckus from his desk.
He reluctantly got up and found his phone, still beside the notebook. He turned off the alarm and slid his worn
boots on and started towards Yuuki’s apartment.
He had to take the subway, because as much as Yuuki loved New York, he
hated living in the actual city. A half
hour had passed when he tapped on his door.
A muffled voice said, “coming.” And the lock slid on
the door and Yuuki welcomed him in.
“What’s got you all peppy?” Michael asked as Yuuki
all but shoved him into the bathroom where a new pair of jeans and a white
dress shirt waited.
“DJ Rocket is playing at the club around the
corner. He starts at 9 and I don’t want
to miss a second! So hurry and get
dressed.” Yuuki sounded slightly like a
school girl, but Michael decided it was better not to mention.
“I have no idea who that is, but ok, calm your britches.” He slid off his two shirts leaving him
in only his black tank. He put on the new shirt and jeans. “I feel like we are girls.” He said as Yuuki
waited in the hall.
He made a tsk noise.
“Keep making jokes and I’ll start thinking you’re the gay one. You make everything weird.”
“Yeah yeah,”
They walked in the door to the club just before the
light went down. They made it to the bar
just as DJ Rocket was introducing himself.
The night took off quickly, with Yuuki ordering shots and drinks left and
right; Michael was barely able to keep up with him. Then he dragged him to the dance floor and
shoved a girl at him. She willingly
danced with him and he could tell she was as drunk as he. He wrapped a long-fingered hand around her
waist and rocked back and forth with her.
Her heat was lighting him on fire and her long hair swept over him. She reached up around his neck and pulled him
down to her. She kissed him with a
hungry sloppy need. He allowed her to
manipulate him, she was, after all, beautiful and she wanted to be with
him. He and Yuuki continued to dance and
drink until almost 1 am. That’s when he
saw him. His copper hair was shining in
the lights. He walked up to the bar and
ordered a scotch and, as far as Michael could tell, he was alone. He glanced at Michael, his brown eyes almost
black, then he walked away, not towards the dance floor but to the back of the
club. Before he knew it, Michael was
following him. He stumbled down the dark
hall that was most definitely carpeted and had several doors off it, each one
closed. He made it to the end of the
hall and tripped through the doorway covered with a sheer curtain.
“Hm.” He heard a disapproving sound come from
somewhere above him. He looked up from
his hands and knees and saw a carefully pressed pair of slacks topped with a
deep purple dress shirt and dress suspenders.
“Oh, I’m so sorry,” he said as he tried to find his
feet and fell back down to his backside.
“Let me help you,” said the same voice, smooth, but
irritated.
“No, I’ll just crawl my way back out of here, at
this point the closer to the floor I am the better.” He felt a hand on the back of his shirt as he
did indeed try to crawl out of the room.
He was yanked back and almost clear to his feet. “Well, alright, if you insist,” he said with
a laugh. He was steadied by the wall he
was put against. Warm fingers slid under
his chin and he finally looked up to see who was wearing the nice clothing. His dark stare was unmoving as Michael gasped
before he could stop himself. “Lukas?!”
then, because he was drunk, he leaned in and hugged him, laughing and
saying, “I found you!” He was quickly
shoved away. “Oh? Don’t you like being touched,” and, as if he
was challenged by himself, he reached up and ran his fingers through Lukas’s
hair. “Oh, it really is soft, haha.”
“Would you stop!”
He shoved him again, “Why are you following me?”
“Honestly?... I was curious. Why would a guy like you be in a place like
this?” he motioned to the front of the club where, undoubtedly, Yuuki was now
dancing with both women.
Instead of answering, Lukas just stared at him in
disgust.
“What? *giggle* you asked.” Michael started sliding down the wall.
Lukas grabbed him by the shoulders so he wouldn’t
fall but he was distracted and quickly let him go. “You need to leave, what I do is none of your
business.” He turned away from Michael
as if the conversation was over. Michael
was feeling bold though and he leaned against Lukas from behind. Lukas was unprepared and Michael knocked the
glass out of his hand. It fell to the
floor and shattered. Lukas gasped and,
closing his eyes, curled into himself.
Michael noticed his discomfort and stood up, away from him.
After a moment of silence he bravely reached up and
touched Lukas lightly on the shoulder, to get his attention, he could feel him
trembling. He laid his hand more heavily
on his shoulder to give comfort, he didn’t know why. “Lukas,” he said gently, “what’s going
on?” The loud music faded in the
background as Lukas turned around, a look of panic on his face.
“Nothing,” he barely mumbled, “I’m fine.”
His fear sobered Michael some and he felt the urge
to hug him again, this time as a comfort and not a joke. He put his hand back on his shoulder instead,
losing his nerve. “You can lie all you
want,” he started wanting to comfort him but then became angry, he didn’t know
why, “What do I care if you’re alright or not.”
He removed his hand and turned to leave, this man is rude and a bully to everyone, why do I feel like I should
help him? He reached for the curtain
to exit the room when he felt a head laid on his back between his
shoulders. He froze, not knowing what to
do. He wasn’t heartless, and clearly
Lukas was in pain but does a man like him deserve his help?
“Please don’t go,” Lukas whispered, he was stiff
against him.
“You just told me to leave,” Michael said, “you need
to be clearer in your demands.” He snipped at him.
“I’m sorry…” he said. “Please, stay.” He reached up and grasped Michael’s shirt.
Michael didn’t move for a long time, but he finally
asked, “What can I do to help?” His
voice had lost all anger and resentment at seeing Lukas’s weakness.
“Just stay with me, until it’s over.” Over?
Michael thought then he realized that Lukas was taking quick, short breaths and
was leaning heavily on him, and what he thought was the pounding of the music
was actually his heart. His knees were
weak and he seemed so fragile. Panic attack? Michael turned to face Lukas and caught him
before he fell, kneeling to the floor with him.
Lukas was still gripping his shirt and Michael wrapped his arms around
him, holding tight to him as he trembled.
“It’s okay, I’m here, nothing bad is going to happen
to you.” He whispered into his ear.
“I’ll protect you.” He said what
he had always wanted to hear when he himself had a panic attack. Lukas buried his face into Michael’s shoulder
and after a long moment his trembling slowed and he let out a relieved sigh.
Lukas pulled away, still not letting go of Michael’s
shirt, “Thank you,” he said to the floor.
“I’m sorry you had to see something so embarrassing.”
“It’s not as if you can help it.” Michael said.
“I should be able to, it’s my body, I should have
total control.” Lukas said with a touch of anger and frustration.
“You can control how you handle it after it starts,
that’s all.” Michael said, trying to allow him to see that he understood.
“Well,” Lukas let go of his shirt and stood,
straightening his cloths. Michael stood,
just staring at him, he was acting as if nothing had happened. Lukas reached out a hand to shake his
hand. When Michael took it he said,
“Thanks again.” He expected him to give
a quick shake and leave but he lingered, staring at the hand clasping his. His eyes felt like they were eating up his
touch then they traveled up his arm to his face. “Now…” he said slowly, “I’m curious.” He pulled his hand towards him and grasped
the back of Michaels neck, pulling him the rest of the way to him. He leaned in and kissed him on the lips, just
a little touch at first then he took in a deep breath and laid his lips fully
on Michael’s. He kissed him like he had
never been kissed before and he was flooded with emotion, most coming from
Lukas. His vulnerability, his fear, his
desire, his thankfulness, and his hunger.
He pulled away and his face was stone except the flush color. He turned and left without another word,
leaving Michael in disbelief.
“What the hell just happened?”
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